Brynn Embley identifies as a straight woman. Matthew Neilson identifies as a gay man, or possibly pansexual; he’s not 100% sure.
The couple first met at church. They are both members of the Church of Jesus Christ and Latter-Day Saints, and their religion is a big part of the reason they decided to get married.
Embley explained, “Our religion teaches that marriage is only between a man and a woman.”
Neilson claims that he is more attracted to men than women, but he “had a strong motivation to try really hard to make it work with a woman so that I didn’t have to be lonely and celibate for the rest of my life.”
Neilson asked Embley out on a date, and he told her about his sexual orientation after just a few dates.. He said, “Brynn, I’m gay.”
Embley remembers the moment clearly. She recalls, “I remember it because he seemed so serious – or like he was looking for some sort of reaction from me.” She added, “It just wasn’t a huge deal, he was with me, his choice – what else mattered?”
While the couple admits that they don’t have an intense chemical attraction to each other, they are attracted to each other. Embley explained, “There was this mutual feeling of complete and utter happiness – like he was my person.”
They ended up breaking up after awhile because Neilson had feelings for a man that he needed to figure out, but eventually they ended up getting back together, and they’ve now been together since 2017.
They waited until after they got married to have sex. Neilson was relieved with the experience. He explained, “It turns out that the sex thing works great, so it all worked out!” He added, “I had never had sex before, with a man or a woman.” He continued, “I’ve heard gay men say that they can’t even imagine trying to be sexual with a woman, and I have never felt that way.”
The couple has been married since 2017, and they have two children together. They realize they have chosen an unusual path, and they plan to support their children no matter what. Embley explained that they “want our children to be happy and secure in who they are and what or who they choose and are drawn to. Our goal is to support them whatever that looks like.”
