Woman Wants to Know If She’s the Jerk for Leaving Boyfriend’s Name Off of the House She’s Buying for Them

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Buying a new home can be exciting and stressful. There are a lot of things to think about and finalize before making the purchase official.

One woman who is in the process of buying her first home turned to Reddit to ask for some advice. She explained that she and her boyfriend will be living in the house together, but she wants the home to be in her name only since she is paying the downpayment. Her boyfriend wants his name to be on the deed too.

She explained that they currently live together in an apartment, and their mortgage will be less than their rent is currently. They’ve been splitting the cost of their rent, so the plan is to split the cost of their mortgage as well.

Her boyfriend has trouble holding down a job. She explained that he “doesn’t have a very good work ethic and has had about 8 different jobs in the 4 years we have been together, all making minimum wage.” Meanwhile, she makes about $80,000 a year, so they agreed to look for a home that she would be able to afford based on her salary alone.

In addition, her boyfriend doesn’t have any savings. She will be covering the cost for literally everything. He just has to pay half the mortgage. She thinks this, and the fact that they aren’t married and haven’t even talked about getting married, means it makes sense for the house to be in her name alone. Now, her boyfriend is mad at her. He seems to think that he shouldn’t have to help pay the mortgage if the home isn’t in his name too. She wrote, “He hasn’t talked to me for 3 days now and I really don’t think I’m in the wrong here.”

Reddit users are overwhelmingly siding with the girlfriend. One person explained that it would never be advised to put his name on the deed. The comment reads, “Any lawyer or fiduciary would say this would be a very dumb move with huge risk to you.” The comment continues, “if/when you get married, then you can talk to attorneys and figure out how he can buy into the house in a way that takes his previous rent payments into account. I get that he’s upset he won’t have any equity, but that can come later.”

Another person wrote, “In my 20s I was in your boyfriend’s position and I never EVER thought that my name should be on the Note.”

Many other Reddit users advised the girlfriend to think twice about her relationship with her boyfriend. One comment reads, “Why are dating a man for 4 years that lives paycheck to paycheck and YOU describe as lacking work ethic?! Women (and men) PLEASE let’s do better for ourselves.”