13 People Share the Pointless Things They’d Buy If They Became Billionaires

Alex Oakenman via Dollar Photo Club

Ah, what it’s like to dream of being a billionaire…with all that money, you’d have not a care in the world—and probably, a bunch of other things, some even pointless. Because why not?

Think about it: Being a billionaire means you can afford to buy even the most useless of items, perhaps things you’d use once or even just silly objects you’d like to look at it.

In a recent Reddit thread, people shared the most impractical things they’d buy if they suddenly came into so much money. Here are the top responses!

  1. A Snake

    “Habitat and everything. And not a cheap one either, an expensive ass snake. Like a 2,000 dollar snake. Then I’d pay someone to take care of it, but the point is I bought a snake.”

  2. The Roundest Ball in the World

    “Raw material cost €1 million and it’s literally the most pointless thing in the world.”

  3. A Sack of Hammers

    “Then when anyone says something that pisses me off, I’ll point at it and say, ‘you’re not dumber than that are you?!’”

  4. An Old-School Movie Theater

    “A 1950s style movie theater with balconies and ushers in pillbox hats and shiny brass buttons. It’d be enormous, to fit as many as possible in comfort, with a massive screen and top-of-the-line modern sound system. Tickets at the box office only, cheap prices for all but luxury balconies. High paid staff. Classic concessions, at low prices. Movies shown would be chosen by me, daily. All my favorites.”

  5. A Roomba Lawn Mower

    “If it’s anything like the vacuum then I’m still putting in time watching it making sure it doesn’t get stuck somewhere or need cleaning.”

  6. Socks for Every Day

    “New pair of socks everyday. One of the best feelings in the world.”

  7. A Giant Boulder

    “Hear me out. Ever hear of Levitated Mass in Los Angeles? They brought in a 340 ton boulder as a permanent public art installation at LACMA. The project was estimated at $10 million. I’d like a similar boulder, brought in from a similar distance for my backyard. I want people to wonder, “Why?” And “How?” Whenever they visit my home and see a large boulder sitting in my yard, serving no purpose but to make people wonder. They’d have to dismantle pieces of my home, or demolish my neighbor’s home to get such a boulder into my backyard. Perhaps I’d use it as a cornerstone of my house, which would otherwise be made of modern materials, visible from the inside as well as out. It’s the most baller thing I could possibly do.”

  8. A Hype Man

    “No matter where I went, there’d be someone hyping me and keeping the mood right. Like, I’m buying groceries and my hype guy is there going ‘Yooo getcha sad asses out my man’s way! We got parties to get to and fine women to kiss!’”

  9. An Iberian Ham

    “One of those fancy Iberian hams and if it’s as good as I think it will be, I will also build my own Iberian hamery.”

  10. A Fleet of Cars

    “I want every edition of some car.”

  11. A Billboard Advertising Nothing

    ““Headaches? Trouble sleeping? That’s rough, buddy.”

  12. A Volkswagen Tiguan

    “Painted to look like a dinosaur, and where the letters the normally spell out the name of the care model, it would Tiguanadon. Oh and the horn is a Godzilla roar instead of normal.”

  13. A Sphere of Pure Gold

    “I’d make sure to buy multiple trained geese to go with it. Convince everyone my goose lays golden eggs and that’s where your wealth comes from. Keep the others as backup. Every time one is stolen just bring out the next one and pretend nothing happened. Continue the charade for as long as I possibly can.”

Talk about pointless—but hilarious! What pointless thing do you think you’d buy if you suddenly had a billion dollars?