A young mother’s decision to preserve the intimacy of Christmas morning for her family has sparked a heated debate online. Turning to Reddit’s “Am I the A**hole?” forum, the 28-year-old detailed an ongoing disagreement with her husband, 27, over how to celebrate the holiday with their two young children, aged 2 and 1.

Before starting a family, the couple alternated spending Christmas Eve and morning with their respective parents. But after having children, the mother felt strongly about creating their own traditions.

“After having kids, I want to be home for Christmas morning and then spend the rest of the day with my family or his family depending on the year,” she explained. “It is still such a special moment for me, and I want it to be sacred and intimate amongst the four of us. We only get so many years of little kids on Christmas morning, and I want to soak up every single moment.”

 

This year, she suggested opening a few gifts at home before making the 3.5-hour drive to her in-laws’ house, where they planned to spend several days. However, her husband disagreed, labeling her stance as “selfish” and “inconsiderate” of his parents’ feelings.

“He is calling me selfish and inconsiderate of his parents’ feelings because it would mean the world to them to watch the grandkids open presents from Santa,” she shared.

The mother defended her perspective, stating that her in-laws had already experienced Christmas mornings with their own children. “I told my husband that they had their turn with their own kids, and this is now about us and our children,” she said.

Reddit Responds The post, which has garnered over 2,700 comments, elicited strong reactions from users. Many supported the mother’s desire to preserve the magic of Christmas morning for her young family.

“Tell your husband that there will be more presents than your kids will know what to do with, across all of the different parts of the family. You guys deserve to have your own chance to see your kids open gifts, just you,” one commenter wrote. “HE is being selfish by robbing YOU of this time with your immediate family. You can always add more memories with grandparents, but you cannot make up for lost memories as immediate family. Especially when they’re this little.”

Another user echoed this sentiment: “They’ve had their kids and chose their own traditions; now it’s your turn. Going over later and having them open the grandparents’ presents isn’t unreasonable. Your [husband] is putting his parents’ wants above you and your kids. That’s a problem.”

For this mom, the essence of Christmas morning lies in creating special memories with her children during their fleeting early years. While the debate highlights the challenges of balancing extended family expectations with personal traditions, many believe her priorities are right on target.