Boy Mom Blasts Friend for Being “Devastated” About Having a Boy and Not a Girl
All expectant parents want the same thing: a healthy baby. That being said, some have strong preferences regarding the sex of their children, and are less than shy about sharing it. In this case, a woman is wondering if she’s in the wrong for being frustrated by her friend’s outward gender disappointment.
The post originated on the parenting website Mumsnet, which features an online message board. The original poster (OP) took to the site to ask if she was being unreasonable for feeling irritated by her friend stating she “always wanted a girl.”
Friend is having her first baby boy. Is ‘devastated’ as she ‘always wanted a girl’. AIBU (am I being unreasonable) to not understand this type of disappointment? Surely when you try for a baby you know that the odds are 50/50 and you should accept that or don’t have bloody kids. I have 2 DS (dear sons) so this pisses me off slightly.
Her fellow mums were quick to reply, mostly in agreement.
“Get a real problem,” one commenter wrote, while another called being devastated a “ridiculous overreaction.”
One commenter implied that if having a certain gender was that important, perhaps the friend should have put more consideration into whether she should actually have a child.
“You think long and hard before you have children, you consider all sorts of things, she wrote. “If you feel a disappointment due to gender, then don’t go ahead.”
More commenters piggybacked on OP’s statement about having sons, pointing out that being upset over having a boy seemed to be a common theme on the message board.
“I hate seeing threads on here about [gender disappointment],” another commenter said. “[It’s always] disappointment in having a Boy (sic). It’s disgusting.”
In the same vain, others alluded to the fact that wanting a particular gender was sexist.
“Even if they were your ‘preferred’ gender, who’s to say that it will be as you imagined?,” asked one commenter. “A lot of pressure for a little child to live up to. I don’t get the disappointment either.”
Above all, many women who’d experienced difficulty conceiving vocalized their legitimate frustrations. The friend, they said, should just be grateful to be having a child at all.
“It’s petty and childish,” reads one comment. “We have fertility issues so we will be lucky if we ever get a baby, never mind getting worked up about a pink one or blue one!”
In the end, it’s clear most commenters were Team OP. What do you think about people who speak about their gender preferences? Have you known someone who’s experienced gender disappointment? Give us your take in the comments!